For the last 12 years we have been posting about our testimony/ marriage ministry and the effects of pornography. We have taken some pretty intense heat over the years for doing so. I have saw a lot of people posting about kids being sold on wayfair/ sex trafficking. I’m here to make a connection for you and why we have chosen for over a decade to SPEAK UP.
Before sex trafficking- porn
Before sexual abuse- porn
Before child abduction- porn
Before affairs- porn
Before drug addiction- porn
Before mass murder- porn
Do I need to go on?
My dad gave me an international toy tractor growing up. I still have it somewhere packed in the storage unit. I also had an orange mustang toy car.
I still love both the old mustangs 1969 and I love tractors.
Since I was little I have dreamed of one of my own.
We had been on the road for two straight years when we decided to live in Bend Oregon. We knew the father had opened up doors for us there and we planned on it being permanent if He called us to do ministry there and open our marriage restoration retreat.￼
But after being there for eight months, there was a stirring in my heart.￼
We were sick and laying in bed, and I started to tell Adam what was overwhelming my mind and heart.￼
I knew the season was over for us in Bend, even though we had made amazing friendships and learned a lot about kingdom work and what a church body looks like when it’s healthy￼.
As I lay next to Adam and shared my heart, I just couldn’t get the words out which happens often. He knows now how to ask the right questions. He said “why don’t you tell me in a word picture of what you see?”
I replied-“ we can’t stay here, there’s not enough tractors blocking the road.”
“Huh?” He asked.
“Ya, we need to go where the tractors are”
And just like that we took a leap of faith in July and took those two 16 hour round trips with our trailer filled and moved all of our stuff to a storage unit in Idaho.￼
￼￼Or first winter here when it snowed, when we got snowed in I prayed that the sun would shine and melt some of the snow.
Or that the snowblower would start working at the rental, or a tractor would come plow us out.￼
Adam and Lincoln were at the end of the driveway shoveling out the car for a couple hours while I made stew, hot cocoa and butter biscuits.
All of a sudden I heard a noise, there was an orange tractor plowing us out.
I just started beaming ear to ear.
It’s the little things.
We all need a battle buddy, Someone who will get into the fray and help you put on your armor.
When I was deep into the hell of pornography, a man came alongside of me and helped me see clearly. Without him I was being beaten down and just swinging my weapon wildly in all directions. He showed me where to stand and what the enemy was doing. He shined a light on the darkness so I could see.
1.Download the “Armed and Dangerous” men’s study.
2. I will be your accountability partner.
3. I’ll encourage you each day as you walk through the course.
I’m here to be that man for you as the world tries to consume you. I’m not your savior, but I would gladly step into battle with you and cover your “six”. Your not alone and you shouldn’t be alone. I’m here and ready to help you “pick a fight” with the deception you’ve been living.
For all those wondering- here is an update-
We are still in the bus but a couple let us park on their land by their barn which has been an enormous gift!
Secondly we need each other, I needed that friend who hugged me as I cried. Ya know what- I have cried a lot in the last 6 months- I used to hold that pain/ sorrow in but it’s not healthy.
Many people have said they couldn’t have made it through what we have in the past 7 years. You know how you get through back to back loss, trauma, pain and hardships? Processing and healing with others with similar loss.
I know for some of your it’s easier to keep it all inside, but it’s stored there in your brain and it will keep circling back around until you’re able to share and start healing. Glossing over the darkness for the sake of a redemptive story only perpetuates trauma.
I’ll be the open book.
God remembers the evil that caused our traumas. He saw the deeds of darkness. Some of us experience very little while others get a double dose.
One day, he will bring all of it into the light with crystal clarity and perfect justice.
If you’re wondering how to support someone like myself who has experienced loss and trauma or someone else in your life, here’s a bit of advice I will offer.￼
It’s of incredible value to offer a safe presence; free from judgment, shame and pat answers.
I often find it difficult to talk to people who haven’t experienced the trauma of financial loss as we have in the last seven years, I just shut down when they try to say “yeah I had to dip into my savings account and it was difficult, or one time we had to make a move and we didn’t get $80,000 for our house rather we got $40,000
Y’all- that makes it worse. Just be their friend, just be available, tell them you don’t understand why they’ve had to endure so much, but you can see that they are strong. ￼￼
Help- see a need and fill it.
Pray with them.
Cry with them.
Love them.- see a need and fill it.
Pray with them.
Cry with them.
When do you “keep going”, and when do you change course or completely give up?
When I ran the Spartan 10k toward the end of the race my hamstrings cramped up the moment I picked up this bucket full of rocks.
The adrenaline had worn off and I was dragging. At 41 years old, my mind and spirit feels young, yet my body is showing signs of “wisdom” 😉.
How did I get through and finish with strength? Right after this bucket carry I finally saw my family. They meandered through the forest and found the trail. I heard……..”daddy”, “you can do it” “good job Adam”, “we will see you at the finish line”! This encouragement gave me the strength I needed to finish and finish strong.
Our minds are powerful, after the uplifting words from my wife and children, I was able to pick up the pace. I actually beat them to the finish line and finished in the top 8%, 121 out of 1,442 racers.
When the results came out I actually had tears in my eyes. I needed a confidence boost as my mind was telling me that I did very poorly as I was on the trail.
I share all of this not to gain attention or show that I did something great, in fact……. The winner of the race finished 60 minutes ahead of me 😳.
This story is a reminder that we don’t see someone’s whole journey. We just see what we see……. It could be the time a person is going through a tough time or it can be the victory we see. The point is…… encouraging someone can go a long way, prayer is powerful, and your words can really help (or hurt) a person on their journey.
Take time to encourage, pray, and acknowledge the people in your life. Time is short and life has its hills and valleys. Encourage in the valley’s and celebrate on the mountain tops.
There is one important lesson we cannot overlook, the valleys produce fruits, vegetables, and lush farmland. As we persevere through our valleys in life, that is where the true growth takes place. The mountain top has a great view, it’s pristine, it’s majestic, but it can be lonely and nothing grows there. Remember, the mountain feeds the valley with water and nutrients. They trickle down and give the valley what it needs for growth. Let your mountain-top 🏔 be a refreshing nourishment to someone in the valley and vise -versa.
Many blessings, Adam “the first man”
A different kind of love story
On a hot summer day in July they were married at the tender age of 20. The hoped for a beautiful story with children and love abounding.
But the honeymoon ended before it began.
They instead embarked on a journey of rough waters. Their ship lashed around as the waters roared and they hardly survived the storm as they washed up on shore and crawled unto dry land, weak, tired and barely moving.
Anger and addictions stole their joy as of thieves in the night.
Those 7 years would never be forgotten, but their survival would become a new kind of love story.
A new man would emerge, a new women would find grace and mercy.
Soon a baby would be born as a promise from God that they had truly been given a new life.
Then 2 more to follow.
For the next 12 years they would grow this new kind of love, always remembered was the ship of pain, but embraced was the new endeavor of hope.
Born from this new love was a story to be shared with the ones who are desperate for hope, calling out in the night through tears to God for answers.
True hope for others sailing in the storms of life in uncharted waters. Many lost at sea and overtaken by the grip of pain and the waves of regret.
Our love story is different from the rest.
It celebrates a redeemed and restored marriage. One that's real and raw.
An undying love for each other and Christ.
Sacrificing, bondage breaking, relentless love.
The kind of pursuit that leaves you breathless, powerless to take another step, the road long and the body weak. A miraculous love of the Heavenly Father steps in to carry us through. Though the journey long and the body weak, the more we fight for us the stronger we become.
3 cords bound together.
A brave man, an enduring women, a faithful God.
The power of prayer and the gift of a new beginning. But don’t be deceived-
Healing came in layers, days and years.
Warriors fight. Truth prevails. Jesus heals.
My warrior nevertheless emerged from the deep dark waters, his body, heart and mind growing day by day in strength, courage and vitality.
He shares the fight, he moves in victory, he isn’t scared of truth.
Adam Wegman your my love- my knight and we stand in awe of all our God has done!
Haven House Ministries -The Wegmans
It’s time to exercise our faith. I was wondering why there has been a lot of adversity for us over the last several years.
Lonely times, moments of doubt and fear, the “what if” thoughts, and trusting in Yahweh for our daily bread. He wants our hearts and will allow us to be uncomfortable in order to rely on him and draw near to him. When things are going extremely well, we tend to let pride creep in. Struggle keeps us humble and our focus on God.
I was recently reading about Moses. Remember he was a baby left in a basket in the river (he started off in struggle). Then, grew up in the palace living the easy life. Until he realized who he was and became angry with the slave drivers. Then he spent time alone in the wilderness and God appeared to him. He was then asked to do some very very hard things. 1. Face pharaoh 2. Lead over a million people 3. Face certain death for all the Hebrews up against the Red Sea 4. Listen to grumbling after God just rescued them from slavery and death 5. He didn’t get to enter the promise land after all of that.
Moses has enough faith for a whole nation of people!!! He met with Yahweh many times and trusted him fully. And when it was nearly time to enter the promise land, he breathed his last breath.
Here is what the Bible says about his death
“So Moses the servant of the Lord died there in the land of Moab, according to the word of the Lord. And He buried him in the valley in the land of Moab, opposite Beth-peor; but no man knows his burial place to this day. Although Moses was one hundred and twenty years old when he died, his eye was not dim, nor his vigor abated.”
Keep running the race and do not give up. We are going to face trials of all kinds, yet God cares enough to see us through. Moses was 120, had great eye site and was full of vigor!
“Father, sustain me as you sustained your servant Moses, and create in me a pure heart for your people”. “Rescue us from the hand of the oppressors, while we seek you.”